Not sure if y’all know this yet, but two very significant things went down in the hip hop world just now (now being Friday March 15 at 7PM WEST COAST).

First TMZ semi-falsely reported Lil Wayne’s near death from a  sizzurp binge.  Then like literally Twitter moments later Gucci Mane dropped Waka Flocka Flame from Brick Squad siting “disloyalty” as the reason.

TMZ was first to report that Weezy was tied down to a bed and put into a medically induced coma because he was seizing up  violently, and that a preacher man was reading him his last rights. The “newz source” went on to claim that Mama Weezy had boarded a plane and was en route to Los Angeles to make the call on whether or not they were gonna pull the plug.

This all happened in real twitter time, as millions of Weezy’s devoted fans (myself included), as well as more millions of curious internet browsers (myself included) waited on baited breath to find out if Lil Wayne had in fact sipped too much sizzurp.  As the drama unfolded and other news outlets began reporting, it became apparent that at no point did Harvey Levin and his gang, the TMZ’s, ever attempt to verify their reports with like a real source.  They might have just made them up via speculation.  Which is cool.  If you make anything go viral, no matter how you did it, it’s cool (mass shootings and stuff like that excluded).

Those prematurely mourning were granted a brief sigh of relief when representatives from Wayne’s Young Money Camp, Birdman and Mack Maine,  hopped on the Twitters to proclaim that TMZ was just frontin’ and that Weezy was A OK. They had some choice words for TMZ, as did I.

Damn Mack Maine, I ain't trying to hear about bball after that Michigan loss today.

Damn Mack Maine, I ain’t trying to hear about bball after that Michigan loss today.

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I'd like to think that Birdman calls everyone his sons and daughters.  Like Jesus, etc.

I’d like to think that Birdman calls everyone his sons and daughters. Like Jesus, etc.

Pwndage.

Pwnage.

At any rate, it seems that TMZ has backed off a Lil bit, but that like, Weezy is probably not really all up and drinking Mountain Dew, eatin’ gummy worms and watching basketball. He definitely most likely is in some form of poor health, as being brought to the hospital for seizures is never a good thing. At least not that I know of, although admittedly I did no research.

At one point Lil Wayne’s Twitter account confirmed that he was ok, but let’s get real, does the below tweet sound like the type of English Lil Wayne speaks?

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No, no that does not read like Weezybonics, and it’s also pretty bugged-out that his last tweet was to dead people.

This all leaves me with two questions.

1) Who is going to win the Hip Hop Beef between the Young Moneys and the TMZ’s? My money is on the Young Money.

2) Is there anyone in Young Money with a straight name, like George. Or do you automatically become Lil George, becuase it’s better and more artsy?

Current mood: Anxious and hoping that Lil George gives the official statement.

Current mood: Anxious and hoping that Lil George gives the official statement.

On the real though, as my buddy said, “damn dude, we might lose Wayne? That’s fucking nuts.”

Now as for the other issue, it involves Brick Squad a hip hop gang. Which is kinda like The Sharks and The Jets but with more sexually explicit dance routines.  Gucci Mane, aka Big Guwop (pronounced Gwop not Goo Wop) is considered to be the leader of this hip hop gang, but he’s not necessarily the most popular.  That title befalls upon Waka Flocka, who had until now been seemingly under Gucci’s wing, and the two formed somewhat of a dynamic duo in the TRVP scene.  News of their rift is sobering to hip hop fans, to say the least.

Below is the curt manner in which Gucci let the world and presumably Waka Flocka know about his ousting.

#Rude.

#Rude.

In retort Flocka told his followers to “tell Gucci Maine to suck a dick.”  He has since deleted the tweet, and justified said deletion with the following:

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He also claimed that

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So it is unclear who is still BSM and who isn’t… (BSM = Brick Squad Monopoly).

On the one hand Gucci Mane has 1,191,261 Twitter followers.

On the other hand, Waka Flocka has 1,550,483 Twitter Followers.

I don’t remember much from DARE class.  I recall that you could either get beat into a gang or raped into a gang, but I’m blanking on if and how you can get out of a gang and also how the hierarchies work.  At any rate, the good news for whoever is not BSM at the end of the beef is that there might be a roster spot opening up in Young Money soon.

That was messed up.  My bad y’all.

Both of these things will definitely go down as very important moments not only in music but in history.  So it’s important to remember that all of these people make way more money than most of you and they spend it on cool stuff that probably wouldn’t look good on you, but looks bawse on them. Respect.

In closing I wonder what Lil’ Poopy thinks of all this?