Yesterday will forever go down in history as Gorilla day. As you can see above, we are officially a completely functional music website in a class of our very own. Now, in addition to our primo videos, live recordings, and photos, we are also fully equipped with a gorilla suit for our director of photography. We are pretty sure this finalizes our legitimization process, as we are unaware of any other music websites that possess the capability to tackle chicks in a gorilla suit and hug them until they smile. Please notify me if I am incorrect.
We bought the gorilla suit at a costume shop on Hollywood Blvd., which I am henceforth dubbing “Petter-Ass Blvd.” You cannot throw a fuckin’ chitlin’ without hitting a certified creep. The pattern of people you pass on the street goes a lil’ somethin’ like this: creep, creep, methed out creep, tourist (ed. note they come in groups), creep, creep, burnt out skater, creep, dealer, creep. Don’t even get me started on the emotionless creatures that worked inside of the costume store. I just can’t with some people, and if you are working in a store that sells gorilla suits and Harry Potter wands and you are too cool to have a sense of humor, well then my little hipster cholita, I just can’t…
I’ve always had trouble understanding how people walk around the scums of HollyHood sober. It stunk filthy to me the moment I first placed eyes on it, and so I’ve gone out of my way to avoid it for most of my Los Angeles tenure. This has proven very easy to do, you see, I just don’t go there.
Except of course, if it’s convenient for me, and I need something from there, as was the case yesterday. It was convenient because we were already on the East side of town, in Silver Lake, so the hop to Hollywood was not that taxing, and sort of on the way back home.
Now why we were in Silver Lake in the middle of the day is actually the more important part of this story. No it was not just to eat the Pupusas at the Farmers Market (ed. note: highly recommend the pork and cheese)(ed. note: huh, huh, “pork’n’cheese”). We were actually there to finalize our Sunset Junction situation. That’s right, Jam Van’s gone be at its first festival (insert Almost Famous Line here). Yup, after years of traipsing through festivals with no regard for rules or regulations as uninvited guests, we are now going to be able to do so as fully invited, fully credentialed guests of honor. Now I’ve seen the line-up and the set times, and I will say that it is going to be a nice two days of music. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah and the Butthole Surfers headline, and both of those bands will undoubtedly make noise worthy of listening to. However, this one is also packed with some other damn good rock and fuzz. Vanaprasta, the Soft Pack, the Growlers, Hands, Olin and the Moon, the Leftover Cuties, fuckin’ Charles Bradley! Yeah, there is some quality in that line-up and we will be making fun on the weekend of August 27-28, that is for sure. So if you’re going to be at the Junction, look for the green and blue van with the bands inside it jamming, or perhaps for the gorilla running around with sunglasses on, hugging “ones.” If you have trouble finding either of those things then just head down to the Hanson set and we’ll be the guys throwing shit at them until they say something funny.
Alrighty-roo, we will keep you posted on further Sunset Junction developments as they make themselves apparent. Just know that it’s coming, and we’re coming, and say it with me now, “It’s all…” GOIN’DOWN!… I gotta go pack up for the urban camping trip we’re about to take to the head show tonight. Y’all be good now, ya’hear?
Quote of the Day: “I wanna fuck a goth chick some time.” – Un hombre, after seeing a chick with a chain going from her nose to her ear. Typical.
Links for the Day:
– EX-FUCKIN’ SPLAIN TO ME HOW THESE OMFWQGFA GUYS ARE GETTING TOP BILLING OVER RAKIM? NOT THAT RAKIM IS THAT COOL, BUT FOR REAL, THESE DUDES? FOR REAL FOR REAL? GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER YOUT’S? ed. note: and don’t come at me like I don’t know shit ‘bout shit, cause I already told you I saw these fools before any a y’all saw these fools. Stupid asses.
– The Nerve’on’her, get it! Side note, shit’s good.
– From the head stash. Download, play, spin.
– Click, stream, easy listen.
– YES! YES! YES! YES! The best Venice Local of all the Venice Locals. Thanks Mike!